A woman with good shoes is never ugly.

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly

When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.

I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex offenders.

I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.

If you have to release bad news to the public, it would help if you are not ugly.

Life is a little easier for attractive people, can we admit that? Think about it, if a stranger smiles at you and they’re attractive, you think, “Oh, they’re nice,” but if the stranger’s ugly, you’re like, “What do they want? Get away from me weirdo.”

The first time I was on TV, on “Flight of the Conchords,” someone put up a YouTube clip and said, ‘You’re too ugly to be on TV.’ And I was like, ‘That is exactly why it’s a good thing that I’m on TV.’

My girlfriend is so ugly, two guys broke into her apartment. She yelled “Rape!” They yelled “NO!”

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.

An ugly personality destroys a pretty face.

To all the girls that think you’re fat because you’re not a size zero, you’re the beautiful one, its society who’s ugly.

Nobody loves a woman because she is handsome or ugly, stupid or intelligent. We love because we love.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.

How can you face you problem if the problem is your face.

Never insult those who are Poor or Ugly,They are the reason YOU look rich and good!

When people call you photogenic, they’re actually trying to tell you that you look uglier than your pics..

No two way about it, no matter how pretty you appear, if your heart is ugly, you are ugly.

Don’t you dare, for one more second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are.
Jo Blackwell-Preston